Monthly Archive for August, 2007

Chris Rock testing new jokes at Comic Strip Live last night

A friend of mine and I went to see some standup comedy at the most excellent Comic Strip Live comedy club on the upper east side last night. The schedule had 7 comics performing. All established acts with Rich Vos finishing the evening. It was a great evening, but it was just about to get better.

Chris Rock made an unscheduled stop, and did a long set consisting of new jokes he was testing out.

He started out with a Michael Vick joke that was too long and fell completely flat. The punchline appeared to be “I don’t give a fuck about dogs”. The Manhattanites love their pets…know your audience…

He went on from there to “I don’t give a fuck about the environment”, which was slightly better, but not ready for prime time either.

Next he took on Walmart, and called it the AIDS of companies. It kills the immune system of communities, he said. Very nice.

He then went on to make fun of career people. As in how people with career can’t wait to get to work, and how people with jobs can’t wait to get home from work. Pretty funny.

Couple of next jokes were about women. How if women say sorry, they’ve REALLY screwed up, unlike men, who appear to be saying sorry all the time for no reason just to make sure they got their asses covered. He also examined how women never seem to go back in lifestyle. Like when they get a boyfriend in high school with a car, and it’s like “I’m never riding a bus again”. Or how they upgrade to a boyfriend that takes them on vacations.

The best joke of the evening was a step by step instructions on when it’s acceptable for a white person to use the n-word. It was hilarious. I’m betting that ends up on his regular routine very quickly.

Another funny thing that happened during his set was when this young Irish tourist was filming him with his camera from the front row. Chris Rock grabbed the camera out of him, took the memory card out and gave the dude $200 in cash. Apparently filming him doing unfinished jokes pisses him off. He did give the guy the memory card back after the set, but also took the $200 back. Cheap! 🙂

-TPP

Uwe goes Postal II

Yes, it’s a sequel. I know, Uwe doesn’t do sequels, cause he’s a badass like that, but this isn’t a movie.

It’s Bitchfest II between Wired Editor Chris Kohler and Uwe Boll, the bestest independent movie director, evar.

You probably thought Uwe would’ve had enough the last time when the entire Intertubes got to laugh at his reaction to a negative review of his latest blockbuster (uh, yea, in your dreams Uwe) movie. The genius actually took on Chris Kohler’s offer for a phone interview to set the record straight about his awesome masterwork.

Yes, Uwe, we see it now. You’re masterful in the art of cinema making. You’re the savior of independent film. You’re our guiding light. You rock.

-TPP

Paul Dateh – a hip hop violinist

I am a big fan of mashups. I am especially fond of songs that mix completely unrelated genres of music, like classical and hip hop.

I just stumbled on an awesome video of a violinist playing live over a hip hop beat mixed by a DJ on a turntable. The DJ on the turntable is inka one, and the violinist is Paul Dateh. Awesome stuff.

Just make sure you don’t call him The Hip Hop Violinist

-TPP

Uwe Boll goes postal over a review of Postal

Wired reviewed Postal, the latest movie directed by Uwe Boll based on an existing video game franchise. Uwe didn’t seem to appreciate the review that much, and let the reviewer know about it. The reviewer documented the hilarious Email exchange between Uwe Boll, his publicist (whose job should really be about keeping Uwe to shut the fuck up) and the reviewer on a blog post.

I think Uwe suffers from a pretty chronic case of a superiority complex, an inflated ego syndrome, and a severe case of thin skinitis. Oh, and an inflated douchebaggery, and critical condition of assholitis.

-TPP

Oh no! Weekly World News is folding :(

What horrible news! The Weekly World News is folding!

Where now can I read about the latest Elvis and alien sightings, men with three heads and vast Government conspiracies to keep all that information from you??? Nowhere!

Somewhere in Kalamazoo, Elvis weeps: The Weekly World News is folding.

Indeed 🙁

-TPP

Yet another anti-video game law ruled unconstitutional, this time in California

GamePolitics.com reports that a federal district court judge in California has ruled a 2005 anti-video game law unconstitutional.

The bill, which was signed as law by California Governor Arnold Schwarzenegger, was championed by a long-time video gaming critic Leland Yee, currently a California State Senator.

Let’s see who’s paying the legal fees, a millionaire Governor or the California State tax payers.

-TPP

ICE raids mod chippers. The US is much safer today.

ICE, U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, an agency in charge of, among other things, keeping illegal immigrants out of the country raided 32 mod chipping “operators” earlier this week in 16 states. The operation was a cooperative effort with the Entertainment Software Association (ESA). ESA, unsurprisingly, applauded the raids wholeheartedly.

The rest of the country, however, aren’t seeing things quite in the same light ICE and ESA are. Especially gamers. The reaction to the raids has been overwhelming and 100% negative. Even the venerable John Dvorak felt compelled to speak out against the raids.

One of the best written counterpoints to ICE’s and ESA’s black-and-white view of the world is a forum post on Xbox Scene by twistedsymphony titled The Legality Of Modding, and how everyone is a criminal according to the DMCA. It raises several questions about ESA’s motivations, the PR spin put on the raids and modding video game consoles in general.

Technically speaking the people raided might all be guilty of violating the Digital Millennium Copyright Act (DMCA). The raids are, however, yet another sign of how utterly ridiculous the DMCA is.

-TPP

Spammer in the slammer. Good news.

Christopher “Rizzler” Smith  has been convicted to 30 years in prison for nine charges of conspiracy, illegal distribution of drugs, money laundering and operating a “continuing criminal enterprise.”

Up yours, spammer scum!

-TPP